Update

I weighed in Saturday morning and have yet to post my stats, for no other reason than I've been spending literally every second of my spare time crocheting.. 

I'm highly motivated to make this side business a success..

Now if only I could bottle that motivation and use it towards weight loss, healthy eating and working out.

Unfortunately, that's not how it works. And although I still want to lose weight and workout and eat better, it's not quite happening because my focus is elsewhere. So, new game plan!

Instead of getting off track for weeks or months, gaining all of the weight I've lost plus some and wishing to get back to where I'm at now, I'm going to end this self destructive cycle and get back to basics. 

Healthier food.

Water.

Movement.

After a quick road trip (17 hour drive each way) to Colorado for a funeral, I derailed my eating. I gained 2.2 at weigh in. I wasn't upset. In fact, I sent the following to my close friend and one of my biggest supporters:

This mindset is how I'm going to be successful..

Not much changed since Saturday though. And it finally got to tonight when I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I haven't felt that way, I haven't thought those negative thoughts in a very long time. And I'm not allowing them to take over again. 

So I committed. To myself. To my friends and family. To a Facebook group I belong to. To anyone that would listen. I'm committing for myself, but I may need that extra support/help/motivation until.(and even after) it becomes a habit again..

The original plan was to work on it tomorrow. Better food choices and a daily workout. Nothing crazy, just daily movement. But then I text my mom and got this back:

So instead of making an excuse, of staying in bed to crochet or fall asleep at an early hour, I'm out on the bike peddling away. 

30 minutes and I feel like a hot, sweaty, awesome, strong, happy woman!!! 

8pm, 85 degrees, 43% humidity.. Fun!! 

I have the best group of people surrounding me though. My own set of cheerleaders. 

And I try to be the same for them.. But more importantly, I try to be the same for myself. No amount of support from others is going to do anything if I don't believe in myself.

And I really do :)