Race Recap- Hollywood Half Marathon

I've found myself in yet another rut. Feeling burned out and ready to stop working towards all of the goals I set for myself at the beginning of the year. 

My focus has shifted from my passion for running to my passion for crocheting and I'm finding that I would rather spend my time working on the 12 blankets I am working on than work on adding up the miles towards my goal. 

I've been spending the past week hoping for a reason to not be able to go to the race yesterday. I was not looking forward to waking up at 4am. I was not looking forward to running 13.1 miles. I was not looking forward to any part of it.

And that got me thinking about where I am with this whole running thing. My love for it is definitely being put to the test right now. I haven't gone for a run since my last race two weeks ago. I just haven't felt the want to do it. 

But that's not going to help in the long run. I still have 2 marathons and 3-4 half marathons this year and a marathon and 10K I'm already signed up for next year. 

When we started the race my legs were tight and I kept asking myself why I keep signing up and whether or not it's time to move on from this hobby..

By the end I was ready to get back to working towards my goals and getting back into proper training.

It's amazing what can happen during a run. It's so difficult to explain, but the spark was relit yet again. 

I have a feeling that this love of mine is going through a difficult patch that isn't going to go away any time soon. And that's okay. I'm allowed to doubt myself and I'm allowed to put other hobbies ahead of this one sometimes. I'm working on finding a good balance and trying to convince myself that I don't have to do it all. 

Next race is in 2 weeks!! 

The Great Race of Agoura- Chesebro Half Marathon

5 years ago I ran my very first race. I feel very lucky to be able to celebrate that by running not only the same race, but the farther distance of that race, a race that sells out very quickly.

I've wanted to run the Chesebro Half Marathon for a long time now, but either miss the chance or have other plans/races the weekend of the race. This year it landed two weeks after the LA Marathon and gave me the chance to keep running after I finished the marathon, instead of taking a month off completely. Win-win!

5 years ago: 

Today: 

There's not a lot I remember from the race because most of the time I was just trying not to twist an ankle and just wanted to make it to the finish line. Reminder- do not run a trail race without doing at least one trail training run. Whoops!! 

This was by far the most physically demanding race I have ever done, but I am so happy to be able to say that I did it and can cross it off of my race bucket list.

It was an amazing course, with trails from approximately mile 3 until about mile 10.5, including an intense elevation increase. I used my 50:1 intervals until around mile 6 when the trail narrowed and it became difficult to pass people. That, plus the uneven trail made it difficult to continue running. Then the uphill started and I chose to walk when I needed and run when I could without using any set intervals until I reached the top of the big hill, then I started the 50:1 intervals again. 

M1- 12:10

M2- 12:56

M3- 13:08

M4- 13:21

M5- 13:21

M6- 14:06

M7- 15:25

M8- 17:21

M9- 14:17

M10- 13:35

M11- 14:28

M12- 12:43

M13- ???

Total distance- 13.16 miles

Total time- 3:01:01 (official)

Avg pace- 13:49 (official)

The course time limit was 3:30, so around mile 7 I started to hit my "wall" thinking if the course continued the way it was then the sweeper may not be far behind me, but that thought didn't last long. 

I decided to wear a new tank top that I found at Kohl's and thought was pretty clever.. 

I've been blessed in the back side and have embraced it. Between the people who got it and the people I had to explain it to, I still think there were more people who called me Becky. 

On to the next!!

Thirty, Flirty and Thriving

Last year on my 29th birthday I made a "Thirty for 30" list. A list of thirty goals I wanted to accomplish before my 30th birthday.

Here's the list: 

1. Learn to drive a stick shift
2. Take a pottery class
3. Complete a cross stitch
4. Get out of credit card debt
5. Complete a coloring book
6. Take a cake decorating class
7. Organize photos into albums
8. Go to dinner by myself
9. Take a yoga class

10. Ride Lex Luthor's Drop of Doom
11. See Ingrid Michaelson in concert
12. Complete Jillian Michael's Body Revolution
13. Make our apartment feel more like a home
14. Complete the "Dopey Challenge"
15. Complete a 50K

16. See the Harlom Globtrotters

17. Reach my goal weight
18. Write a letter to myself to open in 10 years
19. Clean out my closet
20. Find a new job
21. Send Christmas cards to family and friends
22. Go on a weekend alone

23. Paint a canvas
24. Go GoKart Racing
25. Spend a day at the beach

26. Run intervals all the way up Erbes Rd (1 mile straight uphill)

27. Finish a blanket (crochet)

28. Read every book by Jodi Picoult: Songs of the Humpback Whale, Harvesting the Heart, Picture Perfect, Mercy, The Pact, Keeping Faith, Plain Truth, Salem Falls, Perfect Match, Second Glance,  My Sister's Keeper, Vanishing Acts, The Tenth Circle, Nineteen Minutes, Wonder Woman, Change of Heart, Handle With Care, House Rules, Over the Moon, Sing You Home, Lone Wolf, Between the Lines, The Storyteller

29. Run a half or full marathon in another state

30. Go on a spontaneous road trip

This is what I accomplished:

1. Learn to drive a stick shift- didn't really learn to the point that I could drive on the streets, but Patrick did give me one lesson and was impressed.
4. Get out of credit card debt- getting out of debt was doable this time last year but then we made a huge purchase and that changed. I'm highly impressed with the debt we have paid off though.

11. See Ingrid Michaelson in concert- Twice :)
13. Make our apartment feel more like a home- big time fail.. Because I made our house feel more like a home!!
14. Complete the "Dopey Challenge"- finished.

16. See the Harlom Globtrotters- saw them in February

19. Clean out my closet- a few times.
21. Send Christmas cards to family and friends- sent!

29. Run a half or full marathon in another state- Vegas Baby!!!

Not bad, but I definitely didn't get close to completing the list. Which got me thinking.. 

Why do I keep doing this to myself? I mean, I get the point of goals, but clearly I don't get how to actually do them. That's not going to stop me though, because one day I will set a goal that I stick to.

The idea of turning thirty has been on my mind for a while. I'll admit to having a mini meltdown shortly after turning 29, but that didn't last long when I realized how awesome my thirties are going to be. 

I think part of what's throwing me for a loop is that I really do not feel like I'm about to be 30. Early to mid 20's? Sure! 30? No way. I guess that's a good thing though.. 

Maybe it's because my life hasn't played out quite how I imagined. Although it never really does for anyone I believe. You can make plans but it doesn't mean it will work out that way. What's important is looking back and being thankful for the experiences you did have. 

So, with that, I am making one goal for my thirties. One thing that I want to accomplish, and get in the habit of, is taking better care of myself- mentally, physically, emotionally, financially. 

I need to find the things that make me the happiest and do them, get them, be around them. The things that bring me down? See ya!! I don't have time for that negativity in my life.. 

I'm excited to see what is in store for me and my family. 

5 Year Runnerversary

Tomorrow is a very important date for me. It marks 5 years since I completed my first race, a 5K on my 25th birthday..

I hated every single second of it, right up until I crossed the finish line. After that, I was hooked. 

Here I am, 5 years later and I have a history that I am very proud of. 

5Ks- 12

10Ks- 5

10 milers- 1

Half marathons- 23

Full marathons- 5

To make this anniversary even more special, the same race I ran 5 years ago, The Great Race of Agoura, is being held the day after my birthday this year. 5 years and 1 day after my first 5K I will be running the Chesebro Half Marathon at the same event. 

I've been working on setting up and decorating my gym area with all of my running motivation. I'm looking forward to sharing pictures once that's all set up. 

Here's to another 5 years of running, to turning something I hated with a passion into something I can't live without.

Month to Month Comparison

Miles

January: 142.19

February: 145.71

March: 141.97

Bike Minutes

January: 435

February: 445 

March: 425

Strength Workouts

January: 4

February: 5

March: 1

Total Steps

January: 435,563

February: 480,718

March: 513,906

Longest Run Streak

January: 4 days

February: 2 days

March: 2 days

Longest Workout Streak

January: 12 days

February: 13 days

March: 8 days

Weigh In

Starting weight: 183.8

Goal weight: 163.8

Last months weight: 182.4

Current weight: 192.6

Current +/-: +10.2

Total +/-: +8.8

BMI: 28.4

Body fat %: 28.9%

Measurements- starting 

Bust: 40"

Waist: 35.5"

Hips: 44.5"

L thigh: 25.75"

L arm: 12.5"

Measurements- current 

Bust: 41 (+1)

Waist: 37 (+1.5)

Hips: 45.5 (+1)

L thigh: 26.75 (+1)

L arm: 12.75 (+0.25)

I'm not proud of what happened this past month, and I'm not going to make excuses.

MyFitnessPal and have started the day with a healthy breakfast and lunch. I am going to focus on my self control and not mindlessly snack when I get bored. It's an ongoing battle for me and I can only take it one day at a time (at least, that's the only option I know of).

I wish that I could be a success story. That I could set my mind to doing this and actually follow through. I am so tired of starting over to only make it a day or two before I fall off course.

But, I'm not going to get anywhere by wishing. I have to get to my goal by doing. Doing the tracking, the better choices, the workouts, the positive thoughts, the self kindness. I can't change this past month. I can't make myself go back and make better choices or track the foods that I ate. I can, however, look forward. I can see that I'm making a change now. Whether it sticks this time or not is not up for me to worry about. I just have to do my best now and see where it takes me.

I can look at the positive points and see that even though I do keep re-starting, I am re-starting. I'm not giving up completely. One of these times it will happen for me. I just have to be ready for it..

Lego Themed Birthday Party

I really didn't think I could pull off another birthday that would match the Frozen party of last year.. Although there were no visits from the characters of the Lego movie, I would like to think that this years party held up pretty well compared to last year.

With that being said, next year I may have to consider going into the party store and finding a theme that has all the supplies ready to go. Then again, since Isabel is already thinking of her 8th birthday, it appears as though I'll be piecing together a Teen Titan's Go party, and there's really not much of anything out there for that! 

I do this every year. I get nostalgic and think of Isabel's birth story and I look at my favorite picture of the two of us from that day. Isabel really enjoys hearing the story and about how she was placed on my chest on the operating table and I touched her nose and said "I know you.."

We started our morning off pretty early at a work function. A 5K that we decided to run together. 

Unfortunately, she fell just after mile one and I needed to carry her back to the start with a scraped up knee and elbow that were bleeding. She refused a bandaid though. 

But she was fine just in time to go out to breakfast. 

Next stop was the convention center in LA, where she helped me navigate my way to pick up my race packet for Sunday's marathon. 

And then it was straight home to decorate for her party. 

I still cannot believe I have a 7 year old. It always used to crack me up when people would say how fast time flies, but it is so true! It really does go by in a blink of an eye. 

I wouldn't change a minute of my time with her. Everything we've been through together has helped build our relationship and although I'm not the mom I thought I would be, I am a damn good mom. Not perfect (but no one is), and still learning along the way (anyone want to share the manual?!), but I have a really smart and pretty fantastic little girl. She absolutely pushes my buttons and makes me smile every day. When she hurts, I hurt and there is nothing I wouldn't do to make that hurt stop. She is the brightest part of my day and although it's not always easy, it is absolutely worth every frustrated tear or angry outburst. 

I will never claim to be a great parent. I make mistakes, and I make them often. I've done and said things I'm not proud of. I'm human. But I cannot love another person more than I love my Isabel- my bug. And I can only learn from my mistakes and be better with each day. And when all is said and done, I am a good parent, and I think that's pretty great in itself.